I was recently told I was a know it all

So I was told by someone I really care about that I was a know it all. And because of that , it was difficult for them to open up to me.
                                       
That cut me deep. So deep, actually. Because it was always something I hoped I'd never be. Especially because I've always been so hard on myself, feeling like I didn't know enough.

What's so crazy about this is that I HATE know it all's...and turns out that I am one.

Damn.

See I've always been really insecure about a lot as far as intellect was concerned. It didn't start that way of course. When I was younger, I always had a thirst for knowledge. Reading,writing, music, black history , women's history. .. I was always very passionate about knowing.                  

Once it was acknowledged by others , I started to take a certain amount of pride in what I did know. realizing that what I did for fun, others loathed. I was different.  coming up in a place where seeking out your identity was necessary, I knew who I was.

But then I met other smart girls... And I became insecure. Feeling as though now it wasn't just enough to know I was smart but everyone had to know. I just didn't want to lose my thing..

And now I'm a know it all.

Ugh I just hate that ... It was never my intention. But this is why insecurity is a horrible ,horrible thing. I turned a fear into a reality.

And now I want to undo this.

But how do you do so when you want to share what you know?? How do you educate without making others feel as though they are inferior because they didn't know?

Maybe it starts with my need of validity as far as my intellect is concerned. I lost my slice if humble pie and now I need to get back in the kitchen to whip up another batch.

So.. yeah...  that's what I'm working on .